I just feel that you're hiding something from me. It's not that I'm trying to make assumptions. Remember the other time I told you that you're acting strangely, your attitude towards me is different. And I got to know that you're in contact with Shima. See, my instincts are always right. It's up to you whether you wnat to tell me the truth or not. The decision is yours. Maybe it's not the right time for me to know and not the right time for you to tell. It's not that I'm going to get angry if you tell me the truth. No matter how big the situation is.

If you still in contact with your ex, so be it. If you're in contact with other girl, so be it. If you had fallen in love with someone else, so be it. But at least tell me the truth. I may get jealous, but hey! at least I know there's integrity in you.





You're hiding something cause it's burning through your eyes.









Tired and exhausted. Just got home from Circle Green. Lepak with Cicakman, Yanabiol, Bak and two of his friends. Yesterday was at Marq's place, drink smoke drink smoke. Gets home around 0530 and didn't attend English and POA lessons. Met hunny kibawa at Mac before Malay lesson. Plans for this weekend, corrupted. Tomorrow will surely town-ing with Ira only. Maybe will ask Marq and Cicakman to tag along if they want to.

Need to sleep now. My eyes da stone rabak. You know, I know but public don't know. Haha.

Still stress eventhough problems had settled. The problem now is about relationship. He told his friends that I'm his girlfriend whereas I don't even have any feelings for him. I treat him just as a friend. Not more, not less. He do confess his love towards me. He told hunny too but retardedly hunny say 'go ah' to him and Abg Min was like, 'DON'T' to me. See, even Abg Min disagree with the idea of me going on with his cousin. He may be disappointed but too bad I've someone in mind. Eventhough I were to go with him, our relationship wouldn't work if i have no feelings for him at all.


Should agree with what Ira told me when I just broke up 7 months ago. Being single is not easy, not like what we think initially. I need a boyfriend right now. It's not that I'm desperate. It's just that I don't want to disappoint anymore guys. I don't want any of single-life problems. At least I know how to handle BGR problems.





Who wants to be my boyfriend?






Maths was fun today. Marq did attempt few questions and fell asleep. Cicakman did attempt few more questions too and me as usual, did the questions with full concentration. I'm looking forward for more Thursdays. =)




The thought of "it's all over now" just fades away. The situation now is from bad to worst, involving the police. I don't understand these kind of people. I don't get it why they have to make such a fuss. Bad mouths, grudges, twisted toungue, unsatisfied, shame and whatever it is.

Situation unstable. Can we just settle it for once and stop these fights? Da, enough said on what happened either today or yesterday.


First it was my Nokia 6670, now it's my MMC! It's corrupted. Like WHATTHEHELL!


I feel like I lost everything when you're gone. - Promise
Only one message could bring thousands of flashbacks. How I wish I could rewind the time and make things right. I know I couldn't and moving on with life is the best way.


I look you in the eyes and try to reach your thoughts. - One Slowdance
How I wish to know how deep is your love. Baffled and confused. Two reasons.



Nothing matters for now. I'm happy in overall.


I'm not ready to build a relationship.
Maybe sooner or later.


Settled things after English lesson. Went for Geography class in the afternoon since there's nothing for us to do. Funny la that who...erm, Lady Boss eh? Haha. Talked something serious in the car, lectured by Abg Min, not because of what happened at Mac just now. Something personal. Only I know, you know but public don't know. Gitu kan hunny? Haha. Enough said of today. My hunny is so sweet. You know what you did just now. Hehe.

Yesterday went to that hunny kibawa's house after class and Ira brought along the 300 DVD. The show was damn gerek to the max to the power of five! Ratings: 5 stars. Feels like watching it again seh. I want to watch TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLE! And SPIDERMAN! Arrgh! Taik ah, busy with school and studies.

No class for tomorrow. Hell yeah! Haha. Thursdays and Fridays, long hours of school. Weekends filled with activities. Friday, celebrating Abg Min's birthday. Saturday, town-ing with Aanis and friends. Sunday, chayaya day. Accompanying my cousin to settle a problem actually. So yeah, will be tired by the end of the week.

My Nokia 6670 never stop giving me problems. Been repairing it for the fourth time and that's it. Will persuade mum to subscribe me new line since she terminate my previous one. I need a new handphone! Abg Romi has been asking about his N-Gage phone. And furthermore his MMC is with that Cicak.

p/s: Cicak/hunny/kibawa/kambing retard is the same person eh. Don't get conpiused!



CIBAI!

I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED SOME OF MY PICTURES FROM MY MMC! MY BMC PHOTOS ARE GONE! NADDY, NAZZ AND NURUL JR, IF YOU HAVE OUR MEMORABLE PHOTOS, SEND ME PLEASE! ESPECIALLY NADD! THANK YOU. I LOVE YOU!

It always happen when i shift things from something to the laptop. Haiz~




Blogger being sucky to me when I try to sign in using Mozilla Firefox. Luckily there's Internet Explorer. School's been doing great. Miss Mani teaching Mathematics = fun! Hell yeah!

Seriously, you are just a fucking asshole with no brain. Beating up a guy without any reason is bullshit. And still have the guts to say my face is on the pornographic videos. You should just look at your own beloved girlfriend first. There's no point for you to fight like a small kid over small matters. Your girlfriend is the one who's PUKI GATAL. It takes two hands to clap, though. If your girl tak puki gatal, this thing won't happen. And you, shut your motherfucking big mouth. Jalan da la macam puki tersendat pisang! Minahrep wannabe, tak menjadi.

The guy and I share cash to buy a bag. Met Abg Min, Baby and Az at Admiralty and then off to Marsiling to eat. Very the kecoh, Abg Min says he wants to taubat and don't be shock if he did. Alhamdulillah la jawabnye. Antara nak atau taknak je eh baby? Headed to Cak's blk to discuss something.


Off to study and then enjoy at Marq's place.




Seriously I don't understand him, his attitude. Suddenly mad at me and don't want to talk to me. Maybe he just don't understand me. Arrgh! Forget it!

KTV-ed again yesterday with AP, Baby, Abg Min, Az, Tai, Ira and Apai. Seriously, damn kecoh. Actually planned to go explore at Lim Chu Kang, but it's already 3am when we finish eating. So planned cancelled. Someone didn't call me at all for 24hrs already! Forget it!

Hungry like hell now. Mum didnt cook since she's in the morning shift. She's always like that. I want to eat at KouFu. Someone didnt even know I'm hungry like hell and miss him. Forget it!






Exhausted. Tired of those window shop yesterday at Plaza Singapura and Cineleisure with Cicak and Marqus. Went to Yamaha, Marqus taught me a song on the piano. Had my empty stomach filled at Kopitiam. Yeah, dropped by at Aussino just to say HI to Apek. Not Apek my bear-bear, it's Apek Yishun.

The night before was great. Played True or Dare with Ira, Ijal, Aanis and two of their friends. The dares are damn funnehh. I have to open my shirt and stuffs. Ira has to open her bra and those stuffs. Kissed those guys and bla bla bla. We were basically laughing our ass off that night. But if anyone wants to play true or dare with us, please be sporting k.

My iPod is with that retard hunny of mine, Cicak. Hmmph! Yakdish~

Tomorrow schooling. BMC that is. Nyehahaha.




I trust you baby. But if really you lied, then it's your problem. You get the sins and you'll be luckiest person having a friend with loads of patience. And thanks to you, I've learn to be strong to overcome the obstacles of life.

Ok retard! I've been tagged by one of the twins, Nadiah. Have rules some more. Copy paste ah ape lagi kan... hahahah.

here's the rules;

each person who gets tagged needs to write a blog post of their own 6 idiosyncrasies as well as clearly state this rule. after you state your 6 weirdness you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list ur multiply id at the bottom of their blog. don’t forget to leave a comment that says "you’re tagged" in their comments and tell them to read your blog for information as to what it means.

here you go.. my 6 WEIRDNESS.

1. I'm weird.

2. I don't know what's so weird about me.

3. Maybe I'm weird because i bring along Cicak's bantal busuk to wlds mart?

4. i'm weird maybe because i'm just weird.

5. i hate the song 'my love' and 'sexy back'.
is that weird?

6. I'M JUST PLAIN WEIRDY. WEIRD. WEIRD. WEIRD.

ok now.. its time to hit other peeps.

hehe. good luck ya'll

1. CICAK
2. IRA
3. MARQUS?
4. HAMIDAH
5. NAZURAH
6. DINN



WHAHAHAHAHAHAH. SERVE YOU GUYS RIGHT!






It's not that I heard from others ONLY, I heard it myself too. Sumpah I heard everything you said, is very different from what you said to me.

Seriously, I was so fucked up at that moment but I managed to control my anger as it's not the right time yet. All these while, I'm NOT making false assumptions. GIRLS' INSTINCTS ARE ALWAYS RIGHT. I can prove that but I chose not to.






DON'T ASK ME WHAT'S UP WITH MY POST. ONLY I KNOW OR MAYBE ONE OR TWO OTHERS WHO WERE CAUGHT IN THE SAME TRAP AS ME WILL KNOW.


*if any of you terase, i'm sorry. but if you really think i'm shitting about you, call me up and let's sort things out. (if you don't have my number, ask from anyone!)




Just got home from lepaking with the retards, Yana and Faysal. Before that, there's Aanis and Ijal but they went home like around after 30 minutes of slacking. I've got nothing better to do lately, just slack and slack. Everyday routine ah org ckp.

I SWEAR I miss school. I miss studying in a classroom. I miss my BMC friends, especially Naddy; the girl who laugh like a kambing retard, and Nazz; the girl who keeps on saying 'IDIOT'. I miss my Bedok South friends, especially the incredible twins; Adidah and Adilah. I miss my peh-pek; Sheena. Ok the list just goes on and on and on. I miss going out with my cousins. Yeah, cousins day out, chayaya-ing together.

Well, I think I need to eat more. I ate so little now, and I mean real little. How pathetic can I be? 60kg, FAT HOPE! Now, it's only 57kg. How can I get that 60kg if I eat so little? RETARD should I say to myself. Hmmph! YAKDISH YAKDISH YAKDISH!












My ex-boyfie's band, Her Doink Dead Prada, has successfully recorded their demo. Check them out on myspace. Go shooo, check them.

http://www.myspace.com/herdoinkdeadprada



I think I'm starting to miss my ex. Whenever I look at their myspace, those memories with him just flashbacks in my mind. If I could rewind the time, things will surely turn out smoothly. To think back, there's lots of advantages and disadvantages breaking up with him. The advantages are I could open up my eyes wide and look at the world around me and not depend on him everytime. I made alot of new friends, from mats and minahs to those average kids. If I were still with him, I wouldn't even know who's Cicak, Apek, Aanis, Marqus and all those peeps. The disadvantages are I miss him, he'll find a new girlfriend that will bring jealousy in me and we won't be together again.

I'm not ready for any relationships. I admit I do really love Cicak. But if he loves someone else, I can't do anything to it right? Like I said; you can't force love, it comes by itself. Single life is much better than attached. But sometimes, I feel like craving for a boyfriend's love.

Nevermind. The important thing is that, I'm not ready.




7 hours of beauty sleep really great, just woke up actually. Yeah, slept late as usual, playing the laptop as usual. Yesterday really made my fingers hurt by playing the guitar. Basically, slacked with Marqus, Cicak and Ira under Cak's blk. Ate at Koufu before heading to Cak's blk. I was playing 'Tears Don't Fall' intro, and Marq keep on disturbing me. Like finally, I get to bite my retarded hunny's nails. Got home around 5+am but still can't sleep, so played the laptop.

No plans for today. Ira going home, Cak and Marqus at Plaza Singapura. They had their Literature class just now and that retarded Cicak will NEVER stop looking at tetek!

My mum just bought MIO yesterday and the day before, it was Cicak. So now, both of us have MIO. Went to Cak's place the other day as they need a laptop to configure or what la. I was so paiseh going to his house with his dad at home. Really! Before that, I get a prank call from Faysal. Idiot him. Main motive is to ajak lepak.

I think I'm getting thinner day by day. I've been eating one meal per day for four days straight. And it's not rice that I eat. I think I need to go to Woodlands Mart and check my weight.




Seriously, I was worried about hunny as he's involved in a stupid misunderstanding situation. It's just a small fucking shit matter and they want to make it big and it's about bloody shit girl. But at last, that guy bubbled and didn't turn up. I don't understand that girl, why would she made up stories about her own classmates? Luckily my BMC mates were all in good terms. That girl wrote me a testimonial, saying that she's sorry for what she had said about me the other day. I swear I didn't even know she was talking about me. I hate it much when people say things about me, unless they confront me face to face or something. I'll surely respect them for doing that.

Went Johor again last Tuesday, this time round with Zul. Asked him to meet me at Woodlands MRT Station and he got lost. He exited through Woodlands Ave 12. Before that, hunny and Yana came over to my crib, slacked and talked crap and stuffs. Followed hunny home and walked to Woodlands MRT Station to kill time. Bought two boxes of cigarettes, gave one to hunny baby.

Yesterday, saw Yana and Anis under my blk. Talked about that Shima thingy and her bad mouth. Had a date with Marqus at night. Meet him at Koufu to have our candle light dinner. Slacked at the usual place we slacked, talked cock. Konek, konek, konek. Luckily he accompanied me while waiting for Cicak's parents to sleep. Woke up early in the morning and when out of his house with him cause his dad not working today.

I'm hungry. I bought my meal and now I've no mood to eat.